va, ne crains pas*

* Be Still My Soul in French. Translation: Go, do not fear.

Family,

 

This morning when I was waiting in line for laundry, an Elder was writing his family and I just glanced over and his first line was "I AM GOING TO WRITE THIS WHOLE EMAIL IN CAPS BECAUSE I LOVE YOU." I love that and it has Naomi written all over it so I had to share. And I love you but I am not going to write this whole email in caps because it would stress Mom out.

 

La vie est belle! This past week flew by, but each day was really long.  Here is what has been happening:

 

-Saturday marked our halfway point and so we celebrated with a fete. We bought chips and salsa and a bunch of other extremely French party goods, like oreos and popcorn, and come 9:00 we ate and turned off the lights to use these funny finger lights that Elder Wilson's mom sent us. Wallace dropped some beats and Barr danced and we celebrated the fact that in less than 30 days we will be in France! Can't believe it. And it was the funniest Saturday night party I've ever been to. And we popped party poppers. You do what you can at the MTC.

 

-We have started going on "nature walks" around the MTC, which means that we walk the furthest we can to the fence around the premises. So far we have seen mice, quail, and dragon flies. I know. So sad. But just wait it gets better.

 

-Our teacher has been noticing that come our 6-9pm hours of class we are really tired or antsy or slap happy, so the other day he took us outside for the first little while. When we walked outside, Wilson and I walked out from underneath the little coverings and looked up and said "Sun?" and then put our hands out to feel the sun. We didn't know Frere Larimer was watching, and I turned around and there was quite the look of concern on his face. Since then, at the beginning of class he has started drawing "courses" on the board that we do before class. For example: walk to 18M, enter the building get a drink. Briskly walk to 1M and then around the flag poles." Or sometimes we go on walks and he points to things and says them in French and then we repeat them. Insane asylum or old persons home? You decide.

 

-I have this new fascination with Creole. The Elders going Creole speaking are right next door to our classroom and I went in the other day and they gave me a Book of Mormon in Creole. I LOVE it. it takes me about an hour to get through one chapter, trying to figure out what it means. I read it with the French Book of Mormon as well, and it is fun and challenging. I hope I can take a Creole class when I get home. I don't know what it is about it, but I love the language, and I am really excited about learning as much as I can.

 

-This morning at breakfast an older missionary couple sat next to us, and it turns out they are going to Washington DC French speaking, to teach English to West African refugees in a ward there. The man served in France and was a French Studies major at BYU. When he talked, you could just feel how much he loved his mission. He was so excited that we were going there, and it was one of those moments where I realize that I am ACTAULLY going to France. And even though he is a podiatrist now, you could tell that French and his experiences and his love for the people there are still very dear to him. Then we went to the temple and Soeur Hill and I did Sealings. The sealer was so great, because before each name he told us where they were from, what years they lived, etc. We did a lot from France from the 1700's and 1800's. While I was acting in place of these people in France, even though it was hundreds of years ago, I just had the strongest feeling of love come over me. I realized that I will be doing exactly what I did at the temple today: helping families find joy and be together for eternity. What a beautiful thing. I have been worried about losing myself blah blah blah lately, and then dad sent me a great talk by a BYU Professor entitled "Honest, Simple, Solid, True" A quote from it has stuck with me all week and I want to share it. He says,

 

"We are not oysters or abalones, existing in shells--even though that is how we may feel when we become self-involved. We are members one of another, connected to each other, and especially to God, by spiritual sensitivities and obligations profound as eternity. And just for that reason, we become most ourselves when we are most true to God and one another. We become most right to ourselves when we are most right with them."

 

 As I thought about this quote all week, I realized that my focus was too inward, and that like I said in my very first email, we've gotta turn out. This week as I have done that, I have gotten to know people more deeply, felt my prayers become more meaningful, and I feel this increase of purpose. In fearing "losing" who I was, I was missing what was right in front of me, waiting to shape me. I am still ME, and that is the beautiufl part about missions. I get to share what I know, while learning more about the gospel every day and adding to that knowledge. However finite that knowledge is personally, I know that this gospel is infinite and I can help someone find their place within it. I also loved a quote I heard this week from Elder Holland: "It is better to have character than to be a character." 

 

Et Voila. Time up again. Trop vite. Je vous aime. Chaque minute, chaque jour.

 

I NEED INFO ABOUT Elizabeth MOVING TO LONDON THIS WEEEEEK?!? I am so excited for you. Send me a dear elder pronto with details. Somehow knowing you are just across the Channel makes me feel more at home with being away from home. We can send some sister love each others' way when we are feeling lonely.

 

I hope Dan had a lovely birthday and that you are eating at Bombay House or something tonight. How are you all? How is Tru? How is Yale Ave? What is this news I hear of Kevin/Denis's house?

 

The mountains in Provo are beautiful right now and fall is in the air and I love you. Sorry for an all-over-the-place email.

 

Untill next week,

 

Liv

 

 

Also, I am so sorry but no letters this week, PDAY was cray-cray.

san francisco

I have a little journal that Claire gave me with a Jane Austen quote at the top of each page. I was flipping through it this morning and found this quote that sort of sums up how I feel when I write to you:

 

"I begin already to weigh my words & sentences more than I did, & am looking about for a sentiment, an illustration, or a metaphor in every corner of the room. Could my ideas flow as fast as the rain in the storecloset it would be charming"

 

I too feel like every day I weigh my words more than I normally would, and am looking for ways to express what this experience feels like through letters. But alas, I am not Jane Austen and I do not have to most inspiring corners of rooms (cinder block can only inspire so many words) to work with, so this email will have to do.

 

I could tell you about the details of my day, but they would sound strangely similar to the day I told you about last week. So instead I will tell you about our most exciting day yet, San Francisco. We woke up at 2:30 a.m. and got ready to go, and then met our group by the bus. We made our way up to Salt Lake, and I never would have thought my heart would start racing at the sight of University Ave. What once was my least favorite stretch of traffic in the world became the gateway to a day in the real world. We got to the airport and Elder Barr, our fearless travel leader (who had never flown before) pulled out our packet. It was like something out of Amazing Race, so so funny. We all gathered round and he pulled out the cell phone and packets of info for each individual with our tickets, visa info, and info for the city—"your driver will pick you up and courtyard #1." Classic. 

When we landed in San Francisco we wandered around looking for courtyard one, which we evenutally found in some corner of the San Fran airport. A van pulled up and Edgar, our nice driver started taking us to the consulate. Words cannot even express how happy it made me to be in the city. The sun was rising over the water as we came into the city and the energy was so great after being in the MTC for 3 weeks. I felt more like ME than I have the whole time I've been here. So we were driving happily along to the consulate when in the middle of traffic our tire bursts. We pull over, get out, and for the first time I experienced being looked at not as a human, but as a missionary, which is apparently a very different thing. We were quite the spectacle. 11 Elders in suits and 2 sisters on the side of a busy road in San Fran. Edgar said it would take a while, so we walked over to Panera for breakfast and then across the street to the Giants stadium to walk around. We eventually had to get taxis to take us to the consulate because the tire was taking too long to fix. When we got to the consulate they buzzed us up, and we went through security and then waited in line for our visas. They called us up one by one, and I got a warm welcome "Ah! You are French! What a glorious French name." I didn't want to burst his bubble or jeopordize my visa by telling him I was actually an Eastern European imposter with a stolen French name, so I smiled and said "Oui, c'est francais!" It worked and we successfully got our visas figured out for now. 

This left us with four hours to do whatever we wanted (well, not everything. . .) in the city. The consulate is right by Union Square, so we started there and walked EVERYWHERE. I think my favorite thing in the world is walking around a city, and then add that it is one of my favorite cities AND that I haven't seen civilization for weeks, and you have one happy person. We walked up and down the hills, from China town, to Little Italy, to the Warf, to the Golden Gate. I also made everyone make a stop at Trader Joe's where I stocked up on real food. I ate a quinoa and edamame salad for lunch! I was SO. HAPPY. (And then I spilled the bright yellow dressing all over my dress in true Olivia fashion. Sorry mom. And sorry church. Not the best looking rep.)  We had perfect weather, and we just walked and walked. Eventually Edgar came to pick us up and we headed back to the airport. When we got to the airport, there were 2 missionaries returning to San Fran. They were welcomed by about 50 of their Polynesian family, with leis. When they saw us, they ran over and started putting leis on us, and taking pictures with us. One of the missionaries looked at me and said, "This is the best decision you have made in your life yet. And it will change it for the better." I needed to hear that, as lately I have been wondering about how this will al work out. I know that I need to lose myself in what I am doing, and focus on my purpose which is to bring others to Christ, but sometimes this is difficult when you are studying all day and not interacting as much with the real world. Then found this scripture and I have thought about it all week:

 

"O then despise not, and wonder not but hearken unto the words of the Lord, and ask the Father in the name of Jesus for what things soever ye shall stand in need. Doubt not, but be believing, and begin as in times of old, and come unto the Lord with all your heart and work out your own salvation with fear and trembling before him." —MORMON 9:27 

I was expecting a lot of things from this experience, but one of them was not how much of my own conversion would take place. More than any time in my life I have been praying for strength, and coming to God with my heart, all of it. I have been thinking about that phrase too, "working out my salvation." You do have to work to find answers. I have been studying the Book of Mormon and really trying to progress with this plan that I will be sharing with people. I am finding for myself just how expansive this gospel is. I love it, and it makes sense.

 

And I love you!! I had so many memories of you all walking around San Francisco. One being Daniel throwing up in his dinky little stoller on a hill, his ninja sword in hand. And "YOUTOUCH YOUBUY YOU TOUCH YOU BUY!" in China town. And we walked by the hotel we stayed at with the cousins. So fun.

 

Letters are on their way. Thanks for yours, they are always heaven sent.

 

Love you a million swedish fish and trips to San Francisco.

 

xoxoasier uciasdjkf

 

Liv

a time to every purpose.

Famille,

 

When people kept on telling me "just make it to Sunday," "just make it to Wednesday," etc. etc. I would almost start laughing/crying. But guess what? The MTC is going really well! In fact, I actually really have been liking it. I LIKE THE MTC. Okay okay, I said it. This past week was great. There are still ups and downs, but I am getting the hang of this and finding a lot of happiness in what I am doing. That being said, with each day, the MTC becomes a little more stifling as well. There is just something about being in the same few square miles every day all day that makes you go a little crazy. The other day we were conjugating sentences into French and our teacher said, "How do you say 'I'm freaking out in French?'" Without missing a beat Elder Barr looked up and said "Je suis au MTC?"  10 points to Gryffindor. Or the night where we were waiting to be done with class and Elder Oliverson was pacing the room saying "Gotta get back to the residence, gotta get back to the residence . . ." (Quebecs babies babies anyone?) We might be going a little crazy, but at least we are having fun doing it. And only . . . six more weeks to go!

 

But the most exciting thing this week is that we get to go to San Francisco to get our visas on Thursday! We leave Thursday morning at 3 a.m. and then we will spend the day there. Our whole district is going, and we have been planning the whole trip this past week. Even if we have to walk over the whole city, we are going to do as much as we can. Cannot wait. Apparently the visa only takes a few minutes, and then we have the rest of the day until our plane leaves. Maybe I'll just ride around on buses and get to know people, right Mom and Dad? THE IRONY! Ha. That trip was such a classic.

 

Our days are starting to kind of blend into one, as we have class and the same schedule most of the time. Right now we are practice-teaching our teachers in French almost every day. It has been good, but also hard as you realize how much there is to teach and say all in another language. But it is neat also to see how we will go into the lesson with one plan, and then it will turn into a totally different discussion about faith, or prayer, or eternal families depending on their needs. I am working on memorizing a lot of vocab right now as I realize how many simple words I don't know. Like battery. Or bandage. Who would've thought that that would come in handy? And I got the first vision memorized last week which felt great. On Thursday we did TRC teaching, where people volunteer to come in and be taught by us. It was my favorite teaching experience yet, because it was a discussion. I loved it. It made me so excited to just go talk to people about this message we have. We watched a video about the atonement on lds.org and it just interviewed people who had converted to Mormonism about the Atonement. I loved what one guy said. He said, when talking about Christ, "Wherever He has taken me, it's always been a better result than if I hadn't chosen to follow Him." One thing I know that I can promise people as I teach in France is that I know that this gospel brings only good things, and so what does it hurt to search and ask and pray about it? I love the scripture in 3 Nephi 9:13 when Christ says to come unto Him and be converted, "that I may heal you." I want people to have that in their lives.

 

Another thing I have thought about this week is how sometimes things are just hard. But it is important to live them anyways. I was reading in Ecclesiastes 3 where it says "To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven." I have always loved these scriptures, but had only read to verse eight. This time I continued reading and found verse eleven where it says, "He hath made everything beautiful in his time." Time. Sometimes that is what it takes to learn and grow and understand what we are experiencing.  Life isn't always easy, but it isn't supposed to be. And everything will be made beautiful in its time. Dad said something in a letter that I loved. He said that even when things are hard and you are taking it a day at a time, don't miss the opportunity to see the beautiful things in it. We will often look back at our roughest times as the times of the most growth. And then as Mom says, which I love, "Do hard things." And this isn't even really hard yet I bet. France will be an adventure.

 

So there are my thoughts for this week. I'm sorry this is rushed and not very eloquent, but know that I think about you always and love you. Sho sho much.

 

More next week. I'm sure San Francisco will provide many stories to tell and mix up the daily grind. Man I love that city. I'll send a wave and some love your way as we drive by SLC on our way to the airport.

 

I'm outta time, it goes too fast. Gotta get back to the residence, gotta get back to the residence . . .

 

I  love you.

 

bisous,

 

Olivia

sa kap fet?

Bonjour!

 

Remember that story Dad told at dinner the night before I left? When I was little I did something bad and then I hit him and he said, "Olivia, we do NOT hit in this family." And so then I kicked him really hard. That sums up my two-week experience at the MTC. It hit me the first week hard, then I thought I had it covered. Then week 2 comes and BAM it kicks me where it hurts. It has been rough, but also so so great. Here is an outline of what my days are like:

 

6:00 wake up and go to the workout classes with Sis. Hill

 

6:30 get ready

7:30 breakfast

8:00 personal study

9-12 class--both language and religion

12:15 lunch

1:00-2 language study

2-3 gym

4-5 study

5 dinner

6-9 class

9-930 planning

10 journal, get ready for bed

10:30 lights out

 

Beaucoup de study, right? And wow am I impressed with everybody here. People are so dedicated and working so hard, but also having a lot of fun. It has been really challenging mentally to stay focused, especially on something like this that takes so much emotional power as well. But it is so amazing the moments of serious inspiration where I learn so much about myself and others and how I can better help others. The other day in district meeting, after a particularly rough day, Elder Louis said, "What motivates you every day to stay here and be here?" The answers from these 19-21 year olds was inspiring to me. It ranged from to be an example, to help others, to learn how to be more like Christ. They are giving up their lives to be here. And why would we/they do that if this wasn't true? I just kept on thinking about what a remarkable/totally rare and even bizarre thing it is to be in a room with 19 year old boys everyday who are sacrificing what is usually a very fun and self focused part of your life, all to tell people about Jesus Christ and how to find lasting meaning and purpose and happiness.

 

But we also are ridiculous and have fun and will just laugh about things that are actually probably not that funny, but when you are studying all day and are with the same people 24/7 everything seems funny. Elder Wallace and Louis are constantly serenading us with their beat boxing and singing, and whenever we are walking together they do an incredible rendition of Chariots of Fire, and the Elders run in slow motion. Our Lord of the Rings analogies are getting a little out of hand, and it might be a little odd when I see them on campus when I am home and accidentally call them Gandalf or Legolas. Like I said, things that aren't actually funny are becoming really funny here. We have been teaching lessons to our teachers, and it is a lot of fun. We focused on the first lesson which is about the Restoration and God's love and faith etc. Woah. My testimony of the Restoartion has grown hugely. It make sense to me that God would still give us inspiration today. And I think that is precisely what the Restoration allowed--inspiration that is relevant to our needs today. Anyways, The teachers will give us tips on how to better improve, and I am realizing the best way to teach is to just study really hard, and then sincerely share what you know to be true.

 

You are probably wondering why I said it has been hard and a bit of a kick. I have been surprisingly homesick, and may be even wishing for a part of life that is easier than this, more normal thatn this. In one of those moments the other night I watched a video on lds.org called "Good Things to Come" by Elder Holland. He said, "Everyone of us has times when we need to know that things will get better. My declaration is that this is precisely what the gospel of Jesus Christ offers us, especially in times of need." And it hit me. Not only will things get better, but that is the message I am sharing with people in France and Belgium. Life has hope. There are answers to questions. And I really really believe that this gospel offers that to EVERYBODY. Just ask and search and find. I am also realizing that God gives us opportunities to change, or rather to push us to change because he is so aware of what we need in order to grow into who we can be.

 

Today we went to the temple and I got a whole new batch of incorrect pronunciation of our name. I know you will enjoy this, Mom and Dad. Are you ready?

Rondiano

Rondell

Randio

Rendoo

Rangenio

Needless to say, it will be pretty cool when I am in France and people say my name right.

 

As always, there are a million things every day that remind me of you and that I would like to share with you, but then I sit down and the thing is ticking down and I start to pannniiiicc. Just kidding. But maybe really it does stress me out.

 

Your packages and letters are so so so amazing and help me more than you could possibly imagine. I can't believe how lucky I am to have the people I have in my life. Also WELCOME HOME RICHARD! The description of the banner hung across Yale Ave made me Cry. Obvs. I hope you enjoy every second of your Harry Potter, homemade brownies homecoming. Yale Ave is a better place with you home. I saw Clark on the big screen when we watched Pres. Monson's b-day special. So fun. They played "Bring Him Home" from Les Mis which I thought was especially fitting and cruel. You should have seen the faces of these 19 year old kids. I maybe cried.

 

I love you I love you I LOOOVE YOU (said in the Buddy the Elf voice)

 

But vraiment. Tu me manque. Chaque jour. And I love you. Oh so much. And we haven't gotten mail for 4 days because of holidays etc. so if you sent a dear elder mom, sorry for not responding to specific questions. Tell me how you all are and all about your lives. SVP.

 

love,

 

Liv

I mean Soeur Rhondeau. Still getting used to that.